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10th august 2010
i wish i was back in england. i miss my friends. i miss my room actually being a nice colour. i miss my squashy bed which has now been given to my brother with me having my mothers old double bed,, that's obviously a message that i'm too fat for a single bed.
the thing i miss the most is my control. i could fast for days at a time,, the most being 11 but ever since a friend told my mother everything i have only been managing 2-3 days at the most without her getting on my case. i can't even exercise like i used to cz the bike machine is in england. fml! i mean i've not gained any weight since the end of june, but i've not lost any either. i've probably eaten like 1000-2000 a day and even though i still count calories and fat gram etc i'm not doing anything about it. i don't deserve to eat.