poems.

well, i thought i'd just put up some really good poems that were mostly written by shannice. i love you (L).

SWEET SICK ANA AND MIA

I’m fat

I’m ugly

I’m a fucking whale

I’m stupid

I’m a untalented waste of space

But

Somewhere deep down I know

That I’m not too fat

And there’s nothing good about too thin

Size 12’s normal

But for us and for me it just isn’t good enough

So we go the wrong way

We obsess

We get eating disorders

And we end up hating them

Dying to be thin

Oh don’t mind the pun

Because we all know this isn’t fun

Sweet sick Ana and Mia

Fulfilling Helena

But they win.

WORTHLESS
Those days there gone
Hope doesn’t exist
Unless your seeing your ribs
And your not full
Until your empty
And your not pure
If your stomach holds more
More than she says
More than she allows
She’s back again isn’t she 
Stronger than ever
Why won’t you eat?
Because the voice... it tells me i can’tBecause i’m worthless



ANAS LIES
A tear leaving my bitter eyes
As I wish I could be somewhere in the sky
Because I believe everyone of Anas lies
Some place where I’m not tormented and dominated by this
Where food is something I miss
Because I can’t stop, I can’t be free
And we all know it’s not control. You’re controlling me
And somewhere deep down I know
That this is nothing compared to what you can do
You’ve took everything I know, And now I’m living without a clue
You’ve ruined everything
You’re a dirty little secret
That hides in the blackness of my mind
I know how to think and I know how to eat
But I know how to purge, and I’ll kill that craving urge
Emptiness feels so great
And I just love having an empty plate
So I’ll do what it takes
To finally feel good
Food is just food
It can’t make you happy
But neither can this
I will look in the mirror
And one day see a tiny figure
But even when I’m so thin
I know I’ll think
“God I’m so fat, I need to be thinner.”
So this game I finished for a day will start again
And my light will fade from bright to grey
 

THEY WIN
I’m fat 
I’m ugly
I’m a fucking whale
I’m stupid
I’m a untalented waste of space
But
Somewhere deep down I know
That I’m not too fat
And there’s nothing good about too thin
Size 12’s normal
But for us and for me it just isn’t good enough
So we go the wrong way
We obsess
We get eating disorders
And we end up hating them
Dying to be thin
Oh don’t mind the pun
Because we all know this isn’t fun
Sweet sick Ana and Mia
Fulfilling Helena
But they win.
 

TIRED

i'm so tired
tired of thinking
tired of never being good enough
tired of being fat
tired of being so depressed all the time
tired of having no energy
tired of tomorrow
tired of counting calories
tired of being insane
tired of lying
tired of never having anything good to say
tired of fucking up
tired of feeling like i made me bestfriend hate me forever
tired of wanting to purge
tired of trying not to purge
tired of caring.

VOICE IN MY HEADPleading voices
Tearful eyes
I hope they never see
Through my lies
It won’t hurt me
It’ll only hurt you
Maybe one day
I’ll act as you do
I’ll be perfect
And free
My home will be misery
In control
Now that’s the goal
Please don’t try and see
Inside my soul
It’s tainted and impure
That voice in my head
Holds a cure.
 
ANOTHER TOMORROWAnother tomorrow
Another week
Lets pretend this life isn’t bleak
The cuts on the wrists
The hunger inside
The voice in your mind
Saying
You need to die
You know the truth
The mirror shows the proof
Striving for perfection
Your overwhelming obsession
The blood that flows
Nobody knows
They don’t care
They don’t want you here

SELF LOATHING SUFFOCATESYou all know how I feel when I look in the mirror
But you don’t because you don’t feel the need to be thinner 
So what the hell can you do? 
To make this feeling go
Another day won’t hurt
Another purge won’t do any damage
Another binge
Another fast
Another plan
Please tell me when it’s too much
I can’t keep this up
But I will 
Until I’m good enough
But when will that be
Because self loathing suffocates me.